I suffer from a debilitating chronic condition known as CWWS or Chronic Worry Wart Syndrome (it’s real, look it up. Ok, you got me, I’m full of crap). CWWS affects my ability to live life to the fullest by riddling my nerves with anxiety to the point where the only remedy is to hide from the world in the sanctity of my bed with my pup binging on Duck Dynasty. Following the flare up of CWWS is self loathing by my inability to face my fears and more guilt ensues. What causes CWWS you ask? Well, fear of success is an indicator.
You’re probably wondering how success can be scary. After all, it’s what most of us want right? The reality is,that once you’ve tasted the nectar of success, you have the added pressure of a repeat performance. Like the 1st time bestselling author who has to do a follow up book that is at least equally as good as their first novel. Fear of failing is a very real reality. So how does one get over CWWS? Well like Nike says, “Just Do It”.
Recently I put it out in the universe that I’ve decided to become a freelance writer. I’ve had a pretty good start, but I’m not out of the woods yet. It’s still a surreal feeling that people other than my mom (thanks mom!) like my writing. My CWWS is trying to rear its ugly little head but by golly I’m not gonna let it win. I’ve always existed in autopilot because simply, you can’t fail if you’re not really trying. The thing is potential can only be potential for so long. So, by announcing my goal means that I have to follow through. I’m a bit of a commitment phobe so this is going to get interesting. I said earlier that some of my work has been published, so the first hurdle I’ve cleared. Now it’s onto the repeat performance. Interestingly enough, I’m not longing for my bed or Duck Dynasty yet, so I’ll take it as a good sign. So here I am, scared shitless but determined to do it anyway. If you or a loved one suffers from CWWS too, I’d love to hear from you! You know what they say about misery and company and all that jazz. 😉